Thursday, February 08, 2007

todash

algunos sueños suelen ser más vívidos q otros, algunos realmente se sienten reales, algunos sabes q son reales.
mi sueño fue tan vívido, tan real, tan ... escalofriante.
no sé si contar mi sueño, mientras lo tengo fresco en la cabeza, o describir su resultado. tal vez sea mejor dejar el sueño para otro momento, cuando no sea tan reciente.
aún no sé si fue tal vez por muffin-balls, o tal vez fue todash, o aún más simple, tal vez fue mi subconciente dejando fluir imágenes y recuerdos y uniéndolos en mi mente para darle sentido a todo. no lo sé, solo se q aún siento palpitaciones cuando lo recuerdo, sé q aún me intriga y duele lo q pasó, no sé si porque presiento q va a pasar, siento q ya paso pero mi sueño tan sólo fue un, como se dice?, una interpretación simbólica, o es q aún extraño tener ese tipo d amistad, siento dolor al no ver a mis antiguos amigos cuando quiera, no siento amistad en unas partes y menos confianza, pero el caso es q me dejó fría, me dejó temblando, y hasta me causa tristeza.
recuerdo cada sonido como si hubiera pasado hace cinco minutos, recuerdo lo q sentí al momento d cada cosa, recuerdo la sensación al ver todo pasar, al no haber tenido la minima indicación d q iba a suceder, recuerdo pensar "no! mi carro no!", recuerdo pensar q tenía q correr pero mis piernas no hacían caso, y recuerdo lo inútil q me sentí, lo invisible! cuando traté d demostrarle a las personas q quiero lo horrible q se siente haber estado a unos segundos de no volver a verlos. la adrenalina sigue haciendo su efecto en mi cuerpo, aún cuando ya pasaron varias horas, todavía me siento tensa, cansada, asustada, en shock, y de vez en cuando la solitaria lágrima trata d escapar.

sólo espero q todo haya sido un sueño, una mezcla d mi vida, lo q leo, lo q veo, mis temores y mis deseos, y no un tipo d viaje (todash) o un tipo d premonición...
aún no estoy lista para perderlos

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Her wings (se aceptan comentarios del título jiji)

He was looking at the mirror, but the reflection there wasn’t his, he had slept thru most of his life, he looked 50, but he was barely 26.
He worked most of the day, then he went home, eat a meal without flavor, watched the t.v. show that wasn’t funny, yet he laughed when needed, and then he went to bed.
He was engaged, but he didn’t quite know why. It just had been that next step. He said he was in love, he had to be, there was just no other way. He had learned to trick his mind in to believing that, since it had been him who took the choice of that “next step”. He knew (wanted to believe) he was right.
He had put his dreams on hold for more than four years, promising himself that it was the only way of getting them done. He had graduated and started working immediately, he knew it wasn’t much, but it was the first step, and he wanted to start a family in the future, soo he needed a steady relationship, and he needed to feel that he could provide for them.
He once had dreamed of going away, of getting his MD, he wanted his own business, a good one, a big one. But if he left, she wouldn’t follow, if he left, she wouldn’t wait. At heart he didn’t care, he sometimes hoped she would go, but she meant family, she was there right now, if she left, he didn’t know what would happen, and he was too scared to find out. She was a comfort, she meant “safe”.
He had told himself a couple of times “this” wasn’t “it”, he said it was love, he proclaimed it was, but he didn’t feel right, he knew what love was, he had known it, lived it, long ago, now it was gone, a distant memory of his past, and yet, it wasn’t soo long ago he had loved, maybe he still did, but he knew she was long gone.
He continued to look in the mirror, a face too old, he felt soo tired, too worn out, and he had just realized it. He brushed his teeth and finished to get ready, he was going out, without his girlfriend, for the first time in what seemed too long. He was going out to see his past.









news!!

el semestre pasado comenze a escribir una historia...naaaa mas q no sta terminada jejeje peeeeero para los q d plano no tienen nada q hacer jeje y a mis lectores fieles ;p pondre una parte, y asi x pedazos hasta llegar a donde voy y si tienen suerte la terminare jejeje
saaaaaaale se agradecen sus criticas sobre ella y sobre todo se aceptan correcciones d ortografia jijiji
espero les guste